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We Bark. We Curse. We Rape. & We Roll. ♥ ♥ ♥
This Pain Keeps Bleeding
Ah dear letter, are you shitting at me?
***
He called me last night. And he totally broke me up T.T
I've never thought that he could do this bunch of crap to me D:
He called me and told me that f*ckn thing I've ever heard,
When he said, "This distance is killing me. I couldn't do this anymore. I'm tired of this and blah blah blah."
He called me and told me that f*ckn thing I've ever heard,
When he said, "This distance is killing me. I couldn't do this anymore. I'm tired of this and blah blah blah."
I was hang up the phone and turned off it.
I tried to smile. But it didn't work. I tried to stop trembling. But still, it didn't work. I tried to hold on those tears. Really. I've been attempted that haaaarrrdddd to not crying. I slapped myself, I tufted my hair, I bit my lips intractability, but it doesn't work eventually.
I felt soo vulnerable. Wrecked.
Suddenly, tears fell down from my eyes. I couldn't hold it anymore. I cried softly *just incase if my parents could heard it*.
I snobbed. my body are all trembling.
Damn, I was crying like a baby.
****
10 mintues later, I called him back. I want to talk about these things; clearly and with presence of mind. He answered. We've been talk for about 11 minutes. He explained everything. The reason why did he ###### ## me. I tried to understand. Ok, I've ever do this even though it past long ago. last year, i've made a big mistake to him. big mistake ever. i thought that he wouldn't forgive me. surprisingly, he did.
But For God's sake, it has been past looooooong ago and why did he have to talked about it on phone yesterday?! last year, he said that he was totally forgive me for being such an idiot. He said that it was ok. but then, he discussed about it last night and took it as the reason why did he cheated on me. ow. finally, i've wrote those word. oh whatever. who cares?
They said that it was carma. Is it true?
He said that he loves me? Is it true?
***
Nonetheless, I'm wrecked.
And that's all that counts, for now. D:
***
P.S : I've been plurked : "He cheated on me" a while ago and those responses are coming up so quickly. Gash! I'm just... surprise *shed a tears* THANKS GUYS for keep giving me support and those advices. it helped me that much. thanks thanks thankss. i dunno how to express my gratefulness to all of you. MAY GOD BLESS YOU!! *big hugss and kiss*
Labels: Life, Vulnerable
